Thursday, September 22, 2011

Mother of the Year, First Word Edition

Through the course of my research for a writing job, I came across the alarming report that disposable diapers raise a baby boy's scrotal temperature so high that it can potentially cause infertility later on. The whole thing sounds like propaganda from the cloth diapering syndicate (you do NOT want to receive newsletters from these folks--they really do recycle everything), but the "information" has stuck in my head and has made me glad we're doing the whole cloth diaper thing.

Today, while changing LO's diaper, I noticed that (yet again) I had gotten to the end of the cloth diapers without leaving any for LO to wear while I did laundry. Conversationally, I remarked to LO, "I've got to put you in a 'sposie, but it's not good for your balls."

"BA!" he replied.

"Balls," I concurred.

"BA!!!!" he stated firmly.

"Yes, balls."

"BA!!"

This went on for some time. Clearly, despite the fact that LO has said "Ca!" when looking at one of our cats and has been repeating "Dada" around J, I think we can all agree that the young man's first word is really "Balls."

Further proof of why I should not be allowed to have this job.
Posted by Emily Guy Birken at 4:01 PM

1 comment:

  1. AnonymousSeptember 23, 2011 at 10:41 AM

    Emily, now lets put our thinking caps on for this one. [I suppose it,s Okey Dokey to use our invisible thinking caps as long as you fasten the chin strap.] 'sposies as you call them, are made of cellulose and mineral fillers with a trash bag thickness plastic cover. Cloth diapers are made of cotton spun into threads, then twisted into yards, woven into thick cloths. Now, when you take LO to the park, the guy asleep on the bench, the one that lives there, is covered with a trash bag filled with newspaper. Newsprint is made from cellulose and mineral fillers. Now, we all know that guy would be better off with a cotton cloth blanket on a cold night to stay warm. Hummm, now that's a conundrum.

    Now I'm not saying that the "report" is wrong; but, thinking cap physics says those cloth diapers could be worse.

    So until Dr. Wacadoodle passes judgment, you might be better off letting LO go El Nat-u-ral in the house. I am suggesting a good quality 10 mil plastic sheeting on the floor and a Black & Decker 1.5 HP wet dry vac with no touch easy empty feature.

    LO's BFF, Arnold

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