No Wonder We're All Sick

When there is a toddler in the house, one needs not look any farther than said toddler to discover the patient 0 in the house for whatever creeping crud is currently felling the various members of the family.

However, it became clear to me today that LO is doing more than just being a little petri dish who hangs out with a lot of other little petri dishes in his attempts to make sure we don't miss a single illness.

You see, this morning, as I was unloading the dishwasher (which, by the way, has been clean and ready for unloading for three days--I just haven't been up to my usual standards of kitchen cleanliness), LO sneezed one of those toddler sneezes that makes you wonder if you have accidentally birthed one of those disgusting slime toys that childless people give their nieces and nephews in retaliation for past wrongs (because revenge is a dish best served cold and slimy), instead of an adorable little boy without a legion of slime residing somewhere in the recesses of his body.

I have tried to impress upon the young man that his sleeve is not an appropriate alternative to a tissue or a hanky. (We're still working on that one.) LO, with my most recent admonitions against sleeve-smearing ringing in his ears, went purposefully over to the oven--the handle of which is used to hold clean dish towels--took down a towel, and daintily wiped his nose with it. He then hung it neatly back up on the oven handle.

This is the point in parenting wherein one must get extraordinarily specific about what the child did wrong. Yes, he wiped his nose rather than leave it runny and gross. Yes, he refrained from using either his or my clothing as a handkerchief. Yes, he considerately replaced the dish towel after use, which is beyond the ken of either of the adult members of this household. And yet...

What concerns me is how long the child has been considering our dish towels--the items I use to dry off clean dishes prior to putting them away--as his personal snot rags.

I now understand why I've been feeling like poo for the past week.