Me: Oh, no. Oh, G-d! It's everywhere.
Me: No, don't put your hands in it. Ugh!
LO: (Giggling louder)
Several moments' pause wherein the only sound is the whoosh of wipes being freed for use.
Me: Oh, LO! DON'T PUT YOUR HAND IN YOUR MOUTH! FOR THE LOVE OF ALL THAT IS HOLY IN THIS WORLD!!
LO: (Continued giggles)
Me: That's it! We're starting potty training right now.
Me: You're right. I'm full of it.
LO: (More giggling)
Well, on the plus side, the child's stevedore vocabulary and masculine sense of humor are developing nicely.
Just don't examine his fingernails too closely.